~learning to love myself- what’s next~

I wrote the first learning to love myself in May of last year. The next one came in August of the same year after I made a pact with my best friend. It’s been a few month since that one and it’s time to write another.

When I started these I decided that I didn’t want to structure them in any way since I wanted to write about certain situations as they came up. Which is why they are have been a few months apart each time. And will probably continue to be a few months apart.

I go through a lot of ups and downs. I don’t really think I’ve managed to plateau for longer then maybe… maybe a week. That’s probably an exageration but eh.

These past few months have been hard. I haven’t really felt good about myself in any sense. It has felt like I have been in a fog almost. Like there are clouds on the edge of my mind that won’t disperse.

For this post, I wanted to focus on that. On the bad head days. On the days where it feels like the world is out to get you and you don’t see that light at the end of the tunnel. We’ve all been there. Some more than others. And in different ways.

~bad head days

You ever have that day where you wake up and before you even roll out of bed, you just know it’s gonna be a shit day. And you are already counting down the hours till you can get back into bed and hide.

Or have you ever had a day where you were actually having a decent day but then just one little thing… seeming totally insignificant can fuck it all up? And your good day is up in smoke. And then you’re holding back tears cause life is overwhelming and is screwing you over again.

Or at least that is what it feels like. That it will never get better and life just sucks. Well, yeah life does suck. Sometimes. But it does get better. It can get better. I know you might hate what I’m going to say next but I have personally found that it does kinda work.

If only look for the negative all you’re going to find is the negative. You have to look for the positive no matter how small. If you start looking for the positive in life and all that is surrounding you it can help make things easier for you in the long run.

~looking for the positive

Here are some ways to help look for the positive.

  • Think about your favorites. Your favorite artist. Your favorite music video, book, color, movie, food. Whatever. Next, I want you to listen to that favorite song, watch that favorite movie, wear that favorite sweater of yours. Get cozy and just think about, remind yourself what makes it your favorite and why that makes you happy.
  • Write out how you are feeling. Yes, I do mean the negative. Then I want you to scribble and cross it all out and throw it away or burn it, SAFELY. Literally, burn the negative away. These are temporary thoughts and emotions. Don’t dwell on them. Let them go.

~other ways to improve a bad head day

What is really important when you are having a bed head is to practice some self care. Give yourself a break and relax.

  • Go smell some flowers. Literally, go outside and get some fresh air and smell a flower (weather permitting, it’s winter where I am at while I’m writing this). Let the fresh air flow over you and wash away what you’re feeling. Fresh air is so so good and highly underrated.
  • Cry. Let it out. It is not helping to hold everything in. I find that crying is a good way to release everything I am feeling when I don’t know actually know what I am actually feeling.
  • Reach out to someone. Talk to your friends. I know that sounds scary cause it can be very scary, but it can really help I promise. Talk to your closest/ best friend. Tell them you’re having a shit day and that you need to talk to someone.

There are many more ways to help with bad head days. Take the time to figure out what works best for you and what helps you the most.

What are your preferred ways to combate a bad head day?

~Chelsea

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